"Short Term Memory Loss"

I meet my buddy Tiffany up at the bar Saturday night. I sit next to this guy, Ben* at the bar. Ben seems normal (they always do) and starts talking to me. Tells me that he works for some company. I say, "Well what do you do?" He replies, "My company names things". Um.. can you explain?

"Well, you know the Escalade for Cadillac, we named that. Microsoft Outlook, we named that too." So you're in marketing? "Well, kinda."

Okay, is this guy lying to me? What the heck? So I ask, "What's your actual title?" to which he says "I'm a consultant." 5 minutes later we're talking and he says, "Yeah, so we name things at the company I work for... blah blah blah.." I say "yeah, I know, you just told me that."

We continue talking. No joke 5 minutes later he tells me AGAIN what he does. "We name things, the Cadillac Escalade, Microsoft Outlook." I turn to him and say, "Do I look like I was hit in the head?" and he says "No, why?" I say "I'm assuming you think I have short-term memory loss?" and he says "No, why?" and I say, "Cause you just told me the same freakin' thing 3 times!"

Of course I laugh while saying this. He rebounds with "Well I guess I was distracted because you're so beautiful." Nice.. very nice rebound. I say "thank you" and he says, "What, you don't think you're beautiful?" I say "What do you mean, I just said 'thank you!'" He retorts, "Well you said it like you don't really mean it." I reply, "No, really, I know I"m hot, but thanks. I love to hear it. Was that better for you?"

I mean, really, the dumb things guys say. Oh, and then he tells me to feel his arms.. 3 times. Yeah, so you have some nice guns, babe. What else ya got to offer? So whatever, conversation is moving along and then he just comes out and says, "I'm really horny." I say "You're a guy, I guess it goes with the territory. They do have prostitutes for that ya know." He says, "Why would I be with a prostitute when I can be with you?"

Oh, oh oh. Now THAT was a compliment ??? I say "sorry babe, I'm a quality type girl, not quantity." He says "what does that mean?" Really? So I explain "I'm into QUALITY guys cause I'm a QUALITY girl." He tells me he wants to kiss me. Ah, the effect I have on drunk men is astounding, isn't it? Yeah... so I totally kissed him in the parking lot. What? A girl's gotta get SOMETHING to post on her blog. He was a good kisser though. A definite 9 in that department. Ah, at least I still know the random hookups are available, even if I'm not interested. Oh - and he told me he thought I was 25. But then again, he also equated me with a prostitute, so how much faith can I put in this? till next tragic date or bar disaster...