It's feast or famine in date town these days! This week.. FEAST... 2 prospects we'll call *Jake and *Daquan (okay that's just for fun, let's go with *Dave)
Here's my gripe of the week though with online dudes - QUIT. LYING. ABOUT. YOUR. HEIGHT!!! I am soooo sick of guys who are 5'8 5'9 and saying they are 5'10. STOP. Not only does it impact my shoe choice, it's actually a pretty big deal when the girl you are dating is 5'7. If I wear heels, I will be TALLER than you and it makes me feel totally awkward. I say this because this happened not once but twice on my Yeah-I'm-the-Pimp two days of dating here.
Jake's from NY! Seems pretty intelligent and we met Friday night for a drink. First impression - small guy. He claimed the 5'10 and I give him maybe 5'9 on a GOOD day. One drink turned into two (good sign) and we stayed out talking for about 3 hours. Great conversation and I do believe a second date will happen. The only issue - no spark : ( Not on the first date, but I'm not sure if that's just my hangups right now. The big one being (no pun intended), that I'm bigger than him, as in weight-wise, and I've never had that happen before and it makes me feel weird and awkward. I figure a second date is in order though to see what's up.
Now, onto horrible date #2 - The Mutton Chop Man. Dave's profile said he was 38. We met for a movie on Saturday (a horrible date decision - his choice by the way because you can't talk). When he walked up I was majorly disappointed. For one - he was very chatty, funny, conversational on the phone. In person he was a complete and utter DUD!!!!!!!!!!!! This has happened a few times, and I call it the "Bait & Switch". He represents himself on the phone as very confident, fun, etc and in person - a complete mess, lacking confidence, etc. He gave me one of those horrible limp-wrist handshakes and I knew it was over. First of all - that dude hasn't seen his 30's for probably 10 years. I think he was probably 48 years old and lying about his age. AND, his pics online were NOT recent, no way, no how. They probably WERE pics of him when he was 38... 10 years ago! I'm sorry, but that's just not cool. He had these horrible bushy mutton-chops on the side of his head. Was that a strange homage to Elvis? no clue...
Ya know, the looks thing and picking on him, sure I sound superficial, but you NEED to represent yourself how you really are because immediately, I was turned off because he looked nothing like the photos he posted. But the worst part was his awkward nature. He asks ME to a movie, and then didn't pay (sorry guys, but I believe a gentleman pays on the 1st date). Then after the movie, we have some chitchat about the movie and then... silence. That horrid, awkward silence. He doesn't say anything about getting coffee, going to talk, he just looks at me like he has NO idea what to do now. I had these flashback to the 40-Year-Old-Virgin. Hmmm.. maybe. I just can't deal with lack of confidence. Nervous? Fine, everyone gets nervous time to time, but you need to SPEAK. Don't just stand their staring at me with a look like you're about to shit your pants. I think he was lacking dating experience.
(Sigh)... will keep you all posted on the status of *Jake. : )
3 comments:
Jake sounds promising. Being from NY is a major plus. I get you on the being bigger than your man - but who knows, if he's a great guy?! I hate Mutton Chops. Question for you - how old is too old?
Kristen :-)
Kristen.. I think too old would be over 44/45 for me....
just read all of your blog, after catching the link somewhere. Hilarious! Keep it up. I'm rooting for you to find someone. And to keep your sense of humor while you search.
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